Develop A Personal Relationship With God
Introduction
God does not merely want us to know about Him. He invites us to know Him personally, develop fellowship with Him, and learn to walk through life under His leadership.
Think about someone you know well. How did that relationship develop? You probably learned about them, spent time together, communicated, shared experiences, discovered their character, and gradually developed trust. Eventually, you may have begun working together toward shared purposes.
Our relationship with God develops through many of these same activities. We learn who He is through Scripture, draw near through prayer and fellowship, and grow to recognize His character, wisdom, and purposes. As we trust and follow Him, His grace transforms us and enables us to participate in His work.
Jesus explained the importance of knowing God:
“And this is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent.” — John 17:3
Knowing God is not an optional addition to the Christian life. It is central to the life Jesus came to give us.
What Is a Personal Relationship With God?
A personal relationship with God is an ongoing fellowship with the Father through Jesus Christ, made possible and sustained by the Holy Spirit.
The apostle John explained that believers are invited into fellowship with the Father and His Son (1 John 1:3). Jesus taught that His sheep hear His voice, are known by Him, and follow Him (John 10:27). He also promised that those who love Him and keep His word will experience the presence of the Father and Son (John 14:23).
These passages describe more than religious knowledge or occasional requests for help. They reveal a relationship characterized by love, trust, responsiveness, obedience, and fellowship.
How Do You Get to Know God?
Just as we get to know another person, we can develop our relationship with God through three broad activities.
| Phase | What We Discover | How We Apply It to God |
|---|---|---|
| Learn About Him | Background, activities, behavior, reputation | Study God’s nature, His works throughout history, Jesus’ earthly ministry, and the testimony of those who encountered Him. |
| Engage With Him | Time together, communication, shared experiences, observation | Spend time in prayer, Scripture, and worship. Invite God into everyday life, seek His guidance, and observe His faithfulness. |
| Grow to Know Him | Character, values, priorities, trust, partnership | Discover God’s heart and purposes, grow in trust, align with His will, and participate in His kingdom work. |
The objective is not simply to become better informed. It is to develop a relationship in which we increasingly know, love, trust, and follow God.
Why Should We Build This Relationship?
1. God Invites Us Into Fellowship
God has taken the initiative to make a relationship possible. Jesus came into the world, reconciled us to the Father through His sacrifice, and sent the Holy Spirit to dwell with His people.
Through Jesus, we have access to the Father by the Spirit (Ephesians 2:18). We are encouraged to approach God’s throne of grace with confidence (Hebrews 4:16).
We do not have to earn an invitation through perfect performance. We respond to the invitation God has already extended through Jesus Christ.
2. God Wants Us to Know His Heart and Purposes
Jesus revealed the Father’s character and purposes through His words, actions, and relationships.
He told His disciples that He called them friends because He had made known to them what He heard from His Father (John 15:15).
As we study Jesus, we discover what God loves, how He treats people, what He opposes, and what He intends to accomplish.
3. God Wants to Lead Us
God does not intend for His children to navigate life entirely through their own understanding.
Romans 8:14 identifies being led by God’s Spirit as a characteristic of His children. James 1:5 encourages believers to ask God for wisdom.
As we grow in fellowship with God, we learn to seek His perspective rather than simply asking Him to approve our plans.
4. God Wants to Transform Us
Personal fellowship with God is also an opportunity for transformation.
When we approach Him with humility, He can expose attitudes, desires, and beliefs that are inconsistent with His character. We can repent, reject what belongs to our former way of life, put on Christ, and depend on His grace to change us.
Second Corinthians 3:18 describes believers being transformed into Christ’s image through the work of the Spirit.
The result should be increasingly visible in our thoughts, words, decisions, relationships, and actions.
5. God Wants Us to Partner With Him
Jesus calls us to follow Him, love others, bear fruit, and participate in His mission.
Our relationship with God is not meant to end with personal comfort or spiritual improvement. As we become more like Christ, we are equipped to serve others and bring glory to God.
How Do We Build a Personal Relationship With God?
The process can be understood in three phases:
Get Started → Draw Near → Be Led
Phase 1 — Get Started: Enter the Relationship
The first step is to respond to God’s invitation through Jesus Christ.
We recognize our need for salvation, believe that Jesus died for our sins and rose again, repent of our sins, confess Jesus as Lord, and receive the forgiveness and new life He offers.
Romans 10:9–10 connects faith in Christ’s resurrection with confession of Jesus as Lord. Ephesians 2:8–9 teaches that salvation is God’s gift of grace, received through faith—not something earned through good works.
If you have not yet made this commitment, consider the following confession as an expression of sincere faith and repentance.
A Confession to Begin Your Relationship With God
Heavenly Father,
I believe that You are God, that Jesus Christ is Your Son, that He died for my sins, and He rose again defeating death.
I confess that I have sinned and pursued my own desires rather than Your will. I repent and turn to You.
I confess Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. I receive forgiveness and the new life You offer through His blood.
I surrender my life to You and commit to following Jesus, growing in personal fellowship with You through Jesus, and being led by Your Holy Spirit.
In Jesus’ name, Amen.
This confession is not a magic formula. It expresses the faith, repentance, and commitment through which we respond to God’s invitation.
Phase 2 — Draw Near: Develop the Relationship
Once we have entered the relationship, we must invest in it.
Consider your closest relationships. They do not deepen simply because you acknowledge that the other person exists. They grow as you spend time together, communicate, listen, learn, and share experiences.
The same principle helps us understand the importance of deliberately pursuing fellowship with God.
James 4:8 encourages us to draw near to God, and Psalm 27:8 provides a beautiful example of a heart responding to God’s invitation to seek His face.
Best Practices for Drawing Near
| Practice | How to Apply It | Scripture |
|---|---|---|
| Make Time | Establish a regular, uninterrupted time with God. | Matthew 6:6 |
| Read to Know Him | Study Scripture to discover God’s character, attitudes, priorities, and purposes—not merely to accumulate information. | John 5:39 |
| Talk With God | Speak honestly about your circumstances, concerns, gratitude, and desires. | Philippians 4:6 |
| Ask and Listen | Ask questions, become quiet, attend to Scripture and the Spirit’s guidance, and test what you believe you receive. | James 1:5; 1 John 4:1 |
| Invite Him Into Daily Life | Engage God throughout the day rather than limiting fellowship to scheduled prayer. | 1 Thessalonians 5:16–18 |
| Journal and Reflect | Record questions, Scripture, insights, responses, and what you are learning about God. | Psalm 77:12 |
A practical daily routine
Begin by setting aside a few minutes without distractions. Thank God for His goodness, read a passage of Scripture, and consider what it reveals about His character and purposes.
Ask Him a question relevant to your life. Become quiet and attentive. Write down what comes to mind, then evaluate it carefully against Scripture.
Throughout the day, continue speaking with God. Invite His guidance into decisions, relationships, opportunities, and difficulties.
The objective is not to complete a religious checklist. It is to develop an ongoing relationship.
Phase 3 — Be Led: Deepen the Relationship
As our relationship develops, we should increasingly seek God’s wisdom, trust His leadership, and allow Him to transform us.
Two important ways to exercise this relationship are seeking guidance and seeking transformation.
A. Approach God Seeking Wisdom and Guidance
When facing a decision, challenge, or opportunity, we can approach God rather than depending exclusively on our own understanding.
| Step | What to Do |
|---|---|
| Approach | Draw near to God in faith and humility. |
| Align | Express your intention to accomplish His will rather than merely pursue your own. |
| Ask | Request His perspective, wisdom, and direction. |
| Listen | Attend to Scripture and the Holy Spirit’s guidance; test what you believe you receive. |
| Respond | Trust God’s wisdom and determine the faithful next step. |
| Act in Faith | Apply His wisdom in obedience. |
| Receive | Recognize His guidance and provision with thanksgiving. |
| Give Glory | Attribute the outcome to God. |
A useful opening prayer is: Lord, I want Your wisdom and direction so that I can accomplish Your will.
Proverbs 3:5–6 teaches us to trust the Lord rather than rely on our own understanding.
B. Approach God Seeking Transformation and Restoration
We can also invite God to reveal what is preventing us from becoming the people He intends us to be.
An unwanted behavior may be driven by a self-centered desire or an ungodly belief. Rather than merely suppressing the outward behavior, we can ask God to reveal what is driving it.
| Step | What to Do |
|---|---|
| Approach | Come to God with humility and openness to correction. |
| Align | Express your desire to become the person He intends. |
| Ask | Invite Him to reveal attitudes, desires, and beliefs that need changing. |
| Listen | Attend to conviction and insight, testing what you believe you receive. |
| Repent | Confess what is wrong and turn away from it. |
| Put Off / Put On | Reject the old pattern, embrace God’s truth, and choose the new life in Christ. |
| Receive Grace | Depend on the Holy Spirit for lasting transformation. |
| Give Glory | Thank God and let the resulting change testify to His goodness. |
A useful opening prayer is: Lord, I want to become the person You intended. Please reveal what is preventing me from becoming more like Jesus.
Ephesians 4:22–24 describes putting off the old person, being renewed in our minds, and putting on the new person.
Transformation is not merely an act of willpower. It is a response of faith and obedience empowered by God’s grace.
What Can Prevent Us From Developing This Relationship?
Even when we believe in God, our assumptions and priorities can interfere with fellowship.
| Barrier or Ungodly Belief | Truth to Embrace | Scripture |
|---|---|---|
| God doesn’t want a relationship with me. | God invites me into fellowship with Him. | 1 John 1:3 |
| My sins make me unworthy to approach God. | Jesus has opened the way to the Father. | Ephesians 2:18 |
| Knowing about God is enough. | Eternal life involves knowing God. | John 17:3 |
| God is distant and doesn’t communicate with me. | God’s children are led by His Spirit. | Romans 8:14 |
| I don’t have time to spend with God. | Seeking God and His kingdom deserves priority. | Matthew 6:33 |
| I can figure things out on my own. | I need God’s wisdom more than my own understanding. | Proverbs 3:5–6 |
| My plans and desires should come first. | Following Jesus requires denying myself. | Luke 9:23 |
| God cannot use someone like me. | God created me in Christ for good works. | Ephesians 2:10 |
When a barrier becomes apparent, bring it to God. Ask Him to reveal the belief or desire behind it, learn the correcting truth, repent where necessary, and begin living according to that truth.
How to Tell: Self-Test — Am I Building a Personal Relationship With God?
This self-test is intended to encourage honest reflection, not condemnation. It examines whether we have responded to God’s invitation, are actively investing in fellowship, and are learning to follow His leadership.
| Phase | Self-Test Question | Scripture |
|---|---|---|
| Get Started | Have I personally believed in Jesus’ death and resurrection, repented of my sins, and confessed Him as my Lord and Savior? | Romans 10:9–10; Acts 3:19 |
| Have I surrendered my life to Jesus and committed to following Him? | Luke 9:23 | |
| Draw Near | How much intentional, personal time do I spend with God each day or week? | Matthew 6:6 |
| Am I reading Scripture primarily to know God’s character and purposes, or simply to gain information? | John 5:39 | |
| Do I regularly talk with God, ask questions, listen, and seek His guidance? | Philippians 4:6; James 1:5 | |
| Am I inviting God into everyday activities, or do I engage Him only when I need help? | 1 Thessalonians 5:17 | |
| Be Led | Am I leading my own life and asking God to bless my plans, or am I genuinely seeking His will first? | Proverbs 3:5–6 |
| When I believe God is guiding me, do I test what I receive and respond in obedience? | 1 John 4:1; James 1:22 | |
| Am I allowing God to reveal and change my ungodly beliefs, desires, and behaviors? | Ephesians 4:22–24 | |
| Is my relationship with God producing greater love, patience, peace, self-control, and service to others? | Galatians 5:22–23 | |
| Am I using my gifts and opportunities to serve others and bring glory to God? | 1 Peter 4:10–11 |
Consider your answers.
If you have not entered the relationship, begin with Phase 1.
If you have confessed Jesus as Lord but rarely spend personal time with God, prioritize Phase 2.
If you spend time studying and praying but continue directing life primarily according to your own plans, focus on Phase 3.
We should not confuse the amount of time spent in spiritual activities with spiritual maturity. The ultimate evidence of growth is increasingly knowing, trusting, loving, and following God, with corresponding fruit in our lives.
Declaration — I Will Know God Personally and Follow His Lead
Heavenly Father,
I will pursue a personal, intimate, and ongoing relationship with You through Jesus Christ.
I will draw near to You daily, seek Your presence, study Your Word, and listen for the guidance of Your Holy Spirit.
I will seek to know Your character, understand Your heart, and align my desires and priorities with Your will.
I will trust Your wisdom above my own, deny myself, and follow Jesus wherever He leads.
I will invite You to reveal what needs changing in me, repent, put off the old self, and put on Christ, trusting Your grace to transform me.
I will partner with You to love and serve others, bear fruit for Your kingdom, and bring You glory in all I do.
In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Call to Action — Take the Next Step in Your Relationship With God
God has invited you into personal fellowship with Him through Jesus Christ. The question is how you will respond.
Begin by identifying where you are in the three-phase process.
Get Started: If you have not yet surrendered your life to Jesus, respond to His invitation through faith, repentance, and confession.
Draw Near: Establish a daily time to read Scripture, pray, ask questions, listen, and journal. Make knowing God a priority.
Be Led: Invite God into your decisions and challenges. Seek His wisdom rather than your own, allow Him to transform what needs changing, and follow His leading in serving others.
Choose one specific action you will begin this week. Then follow through.
Journaling Opportunities — Ask God and Listen
Set aside quiet time, focus on Jesus, and prayerfully consider these questions. Write what you receive..
- Your Relationship: Lord, how do You see my relationship with You today, and what would You like it to become?
- Draw Near: Lord, what is keeping me from spending more personal time with You, and how would You like me to change that?
- Know God: Lord, what do You want me to understand more deeply about Your character, Your heart, and Your purposes?
- Seek Guidance: Lord, where am I relying on my own understanding rather than seeking Your wisdom and following Your lead?
- Be Transformed: Lord, what attitude, desire, or belief in me would You like to change so I can become more like Jesus?
- Partner With God: Lord, how would You like me to partner with You to love and serve others and bring You glory?
As you journal, evaluate what you receive using these five tests:
Higher Perspective; Fatherly/Constructive; Aligned With Scripture; Resonates as Truth; Will Likely Bear Fruit.
Final Thoughts
The goal is not simply to know more about God. It is to know Him personally, walk with Him daily, be transformed by His grace, and bring Him glory through your life.